I think all of those things are maybe less than 40% of what a person “is” and most of what a person is is how they relate to other people in conversation and how thoughtful they are and also like what they’re doing with their career and what their ambitions are and how they present themselves and how they think about other people and their relation to other people and their place in the world.
And I feel like nerd culture pretends that who you are is the media you consume and everything else about you doesn’t matter and people let their bodies and personalities and minds go to shit and they get this hivemind personality spoon fed to them from a fucking internet community and they let that control their life.
They let reddit turn them into a MRAs and they let tumblr turn them into an SJWs and they let big bang theory turn them into a faux geek. They let the most powerful media presence in their life decide the kind of personality they have and then that prevents them from adjusting their personality in a way that might make it fall outside of the template they’ve been given by the media they consume. I think that assuming the media you consume is your personality pre-empts any analysis or reflection on your own real life personality and how that affects your real life happiness and goals.
People watch High Fidelity and think it’s cool to be a jerk like Jack Black and then they do that and then no one likes them and then they’re sad that no one likes them but they don’t consider not being a jerk because they’re doing exactly what the movie said so they assume it’s everyone else’s fault and they become misanthropic. Really any media or community or culture predicated on the idea that “everyone else is dumb and will never understand me” sort of has this built in pre-emptive defense against self-reflection and that’s really fucking disgusting.
this is a good thoughtful post
I think about this a lot because I can see why some people choose to define themselves based on the media they consume (moral messages, escapism through fantasy etc) but when that starts to develop into a literal coping mechanism for understanding the world, while being fuelled by hivemind fandom mentality, is when it can become problematic
The example that keeps ringing in my head is a post I saw a while ago of someone talking about their depression, that someone had reblogged saying something like “this is me when Destiel isn’t canon”.
A person literally saw someone publicly opening up about their debilitating mental struggle, and decided it equated it to their problems with their fictional OTP and then decided it would be an even better idea to share that in a place where the original poster would very definitely see it
Like, stuff like that makes me wonder where the turning point was where media obsession replaced the thought process in someone’s mind that would normally make them wonder “wait is this actually a really shitty thing to say?”
Obviously this doesn’t apply to everyone who likes a thing, but the fact that there are still plenty of people who would (and do) jump to defend that behaviour is troublesome to me
This is one of the major reasons why I had to pull out of fandom in general for a while.